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"Understanding each other's literary references is not friendship," grumped Pinky. "O sigh" sez Winky, "Grousing about not-liking absent people is not friendship either, my dear dingdung."

Golden Oldens
Sagey telephones from Eastern Outer Space to show off her developing simultaneity skills and incidentally to mention she n' Todd are getting married..."Are you serious? What did you say? Did you have a talk with her?"--- but it is just an illegal aliens skam says Kitey patiently.

Old Saws Still Cut
If you wouldruther be villianously persecuted than magnificently triumphant you are an idiot.

"Keep Xmas in your heart every day," sez Ascended Master Krackoda. "Hey yeah rilly" agrees Drakka, "why have turkey only once a year!" "We have roast beef at my family,"sez Winky. "Personally slain?"asks Pureheart. "Uh ...no,"sez Winky, "professionally, I think."

"I feel terrible," sez Winky, "to realize that I am always using color pencils that I havent personally slain." "Hey good," sez Pinky, "it is always helpful to have a specific whatever to be feeling terrible about." Winky moped off into the forest and came back at dusk with several color-pencil carcasses slung over her shoulder...

It is said that all roads lead to Rome in which case I think the Pope should pay for the gravel.

Oaxaca Mahatmya
O Oaxaca Oaxaca Oaxaca,
You are the blood singing in my veins,
You are the pee distending my bladder,
You are consciousness itself!
O Oaxaca Oaxaca Oaxaca,
Cheap at thrice the price,
Benares of Beverages,
You are the river flowing to the stars
Carrying my rotted corpse!

Representative government works best when the represented can be specific about what their representatives are meant to do. Well, at least more specific than 'make me happy and don't bother me with the details.' This is how's come surprise birthday parties and romantic sex are so often disappointing.

"Sometimes I just don't know what to do with myself," glooms Handmaid Lisa, "I just do not have a clue -- do you ever feel like that?" "Sure" says Bridey Waterknee. "Well so whaddya do?" sez Handmaid Lisa. "Well I use various arcane techniques," sez Bridey Waterknee. "Sometimes I expand my consciousness some more until I become someone who knows what to do; sometimes I pick a fight with Bridey Moonflower -- those are the main ones..."

The roofing committee was having another meeting. "I have an idea!" sez a newcomer, "--since women hold up half the sky, let's just let it fall!" Everyone was very uncomfortable, saying "Thank you for yer imput" and suchlike.

The newcomer went home to Shanghai and rabbleroused about this incident so that at the next meeting of the roofing committee the only topic of discussion was whether or not the phrase thank you for your imput had been employed as a euphemizm for put a sock in it...

RumourHazzitt that the Muffin Man who used to live in Drury Lane is dealing coke -- that's just because he doesnt have any furniture.

Software For Folks Without Computers
old flannel shirts

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